No love {.031}

Me: So, Jayden. You know Mother’s Day is coming up right?

Jayden: Yea.

Me: Did you decide what you’re going to get me?

Jayden: Yes.

Me: Well, what is it!?

Jayden: Milk.

Me: Milk?

Jayden: Yes, milk.

Me: Okay. Well, Father’s Day is coming up this summer! What are you going to get Daddy!?

Jayden: A beach.

Me: ::mouth wide open:: A beach?

Jayden: AND milk.

Me: Oh! Okay. Well, good for him then.

Apparently my mothering has only been good enough to warrant a glass of milk and nothing more. Epic fail.

 

Children remind us to treasure the smallest of gifts, even in the most difficult of times.

-Allen Klein

What’s he gonna be {.029}

The other day Quentin and I were looking at Jayden play. He was playing with cars as usual. He doesn’t get excited about much else.

Quentin said, “I wonder what he’s gonna be when he grows up? A mechanic?”

I’ve thought about the same thing myself. It seems like his main interest is cars. But, has always liked singing & music as well.

I think he’d be fantastic at whatever he chooses to do. He has an infectious personality & isn’t afraid to talk to anyone.

My dad always told me that personality is everything. I certainly believe that because it’s gotten me to where I am now. He works with PhDs on a daily basis who have no personality and eventually they get fired. Not because they aren’t smart. But, because they don’t know the basics about how to interact with another person. For example, interrupting the CEO of their company durring a board meeting to tell him his calculations are wrong. Smart move.

You have to be a people-person to make it in this Country now a days. Credentials are important too. But the two combined are a force to be reckoned with. No one wants a smarty pants that is a nightmare to work with. There usually only a nightmare because they don’t know how to get their point across without offending everyone in the room. At that point their certainly a liability.

I will be uncertain about what Jayden wants to do until the day he tells me “Mommy, I want to be a _______.” That freaks me out because I’m very anal in that way. I want to know everything about everything, even if it’s borderline impossible.

For now, I find peace in knowing that wherever he goes, whatever he chooses to do, he will be successful because he knows how to interact with the people around him. Not because he studies them or has a PhD to say he “knows” all about them, but because he genuinely loves being around them and interacting with them. Knowledge that comes naturally is a gift.

I’ve gotta thank God for that.

We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality.

 Albert Einstein

I love you {.027}

Goodbye weekend. You went by too fast, yet again. There wasn’t much to you this time, just relaxation, website building and listening to my noisy neighbors move out {yes!}. But, in the same low-key token you have taken on, you have been one of the most monumental weekends of my life. Don’t ask why weekend, I’m getting to that part.

You know that little being that grew inside of me for 8 months and some change? Yes, Jayden. Last night, after we read two books and he snuggled close to his Teddy in bed, he told me something. In fact, he told Quentin and I something pretty amazing {now I’m tearing up about it}.

While curled up in his bed, he looked up at me and said, “Mommy, I love you.” Then, he lifted his head up and said “Daddy, I love you!” It sounds pretty simple right? Wrong.

After Quentin or myself tuck Jayden in for bed, we always tell him that we love him. No matter what. The thing is, since he was born we’ve always said it first. To hear that sweet, innocent, little voice say “I love you” before we even got a chance to mutter it meant everything to me and then some.

I want our son to be loved, I want our son to be loving. Love is hard to teach sometimes because people disappoint you everyday – it’s life. But it’s nice to know that he’s learning how to be selfless and share. Last night he was selfless. He shared his love with us before knowing 100% for sure if he was going to get a response. He gave of himself, put his heart on his sleeve and got so much love in return. That is all life is really about & I pray he continues to do that. The lesson starts with the ones who are the closest to you. It’s weird to think of acts of love as “lessons”. But,  how else are you going to learn to love if no one told you they loved you?

Through the years we’ve taught him how to love & in that one moment he gave me a refresher of what we’ve been showing him. Giving of oneself in any capacity is love.

Love is that condition in which the happiness of

another person is essential to your own.


― Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land

Baby Number Two? {.026}

Yesterday morning, Quentin and I dropped Jayden off at daycare as usual. I went to help Jayden put his coat away and Quentin went to put his lunch box in the refrigerator. This morning in particular, Jayden’s teacher was doing before care & we always get chatting ’cause she is amazingly nice & friendly. Love her to death! So we were chatting away and she tells me that Jayden has been telling her things about me. So, I’m deathly afraid that it’s something like “Mommy doesn’t love me.” or “My Mommy’s mean”, you know something like that because boy was he being a brat that morning.

I ask her what it is and she tells me that Jayden has been saying that there is a baby in my belly! WHAT?! Yes, I she said it. It made me second-guess my own body for a second. Before I answered her I said in my head “Wait, am I pregnant!?” I snapped back to the reality that I knew I wasn’t. I told her that I wasn’t pregnant and that we weren’t planning to start trying. She looked surprised and said that Jayden has been saying and I quote “Baby, Mommy’s belly!”

Well, if that wasn’t a hint that he wants a permanent playmate I don’t know what is. Trust me if things weren’t so crazy right now, baby number two would certainly be on the way. But, I think when Jayden is in Kindergarten or First Grade it will be the perfect time. Who knows, by that time we might not want another one.

For now, Jayden will just have to be satisfied with his best friend, Teddy.

I don’t care how poor a man is; if he has family, he’s rich.” 

Dan Wilcox and Thad Mumford, “Identity Crisis,” M*A*S*H

 

No! {.024}

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I knew it was coming sooner or later, but for some reason I didn’t think it would be so soon. It seems as if Jayden said in his mind “I’m going to wait until I’m three & then I’m going to start saying ‘No’ to everything my Mommy asks me and tells me to do”.
Yes, ladies and gentleman of the Jury. Jayden Alexander is guilty of uttering ‘No’ {or shaking his head no – which is always more entertaining}every third word. At three I would certainly have to say that he has a good sense of “self”. He knows what he likes, he knows who he likes to be around, what he likes to do, what his interests are, who his friends at school are, his favoite foods and all of thoes fun attributes that make up a regular person. It’s just fun to see such a little thing be so sure of himself.
Now, if you paid attention to the last sentence in the first paragraph, you would notice that only Mommy is mentioned in the ‘people to ignore’ category. Jury, it just got worse. He has chosen a favorite and it’s not me {insert tears here}! He will say “No” to me all day long. Sample dialoge:
Me: “Ready to go to bed?”
Jayden: “{Shakes head no very slowly]”
Me: “Want some oatmeal?”
Jayden: “Noooo.”
Me: “Let’s take a bath!”
Jayden: “No.”
Me: “Come go potty.”
Jayden: “Noo no.”
Hopefully this phase will pass. Until then, headaches and extra coercing comense!
You can learn many things from children.
How much patience you have, for instance.
Franklin P. Jones

The Ultimate Birthday Weekend! {.023}

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The pictures {and title} say it all. The weekend that passed was the best I’ve ever had.

Jayden’s Birthday party was nice & intimate. Just close family & friends like I wanted. The day of his birthday {Sunday} was a blast! We {Quentin, Jayden & I – ONLY} went to Port Discovery {a little kid’s museum}& had lunch downtown. It was nice to see Jayden enjoying the time with us so much. I’m certainly going to make that a yearly tradition. It’s nice to have no one around but us three on his special day so he can have our undivided attention. This weekend turned out to be just what I wanted to give him for his Birthday; memories – not things. He has enough things.

Happy Third Birthday my pint size ray of sunshine. You have put smiles on so many and have changed tons of people’s lives…especially mine. Thank you for being your fun-loving self & giving me your unconditional love no matter what. I’m pretty darn lucky to be your Mom.

And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count.

It’s the life in your years.

Abraham Lincoln

Asking All Them Questions {.021}

I knew Jayden would be inquisitive, like all children are – but I didn’t know I’d be answering questions every moment we are together. The cutest thing about all of is questions are he asks the same batch of them over & over again. Here are all of the questions I get asked…everyday.

 “Mommy! Whats is this?!”

“Wha you cooking?”

” Wha you doing?”

” I help?”

“It’s a Daddy?”

“It’s GuMa?”

“Daddy seeping?”

 “I show Daddy?”

“I play?”

“Can you open it?”

“I cuddle?”

 The cooking one is new. But somehow I always have a “No” answer for that. He needs to ask Daddy. 😛

Have a great weekend!

If you are not moving closer to what you want in life, you probably aren’t doing enough asking.

 – Jack Canfield

Sleeping Handsome? {.020}

It’s 5 o’clock in the morning. I fell asleep on the couch while watching the biggest loser again {dang-it} & I hear what sounds like thunder. I open my eyes from sleeping and I see a shadow-like blur fly across the living room.

It startles me at first, and then I realize that my son’s door is wide open.

“It’s Jayden of course,” I concluded. The thunder I thought I heard were his little feet scurrying across the floor.

I get up to see where he was headed {I figured it would most likely be the bathroom — okay I was hoping}.

Turns out he was headed to our room. Why? I wasn’t sure. Bad dream maybe? When I arrived he was already in our bed sleeping next to Quentin.

I later found out that he had opened his arms as if to ask Quentin to lift him up and there he landed in between our sheets. Since I surely did not plan on sleeping on the couch I joined them & it was wonderful. Jayden sandwiched between Quentin & I like a little cozy munchkin. It’s that moment that will be embedded in my brain forever.

I’m still not sure what possessed Jayden to come all the way across the living room down the hall to our room to sleep, but I can’t say I didn’t enjoy it. The weirdest thing about it is the things he normally does, like wakes up at 6:00 & pees on himself while he’s sleeping — didn’t happen. He slept until 6:30 and was completely dry. I was astonished & happy, but also kind of sad because I knew that he wouldn’t be able to sleep with us all the time. He has to get used to sleeping on his own – which I thought he had. But, he’s been waking up in the middle of the night to sleep with us for two nights straight. I hope that his teddy and extra hugs and kisses {& maybe an extra bedtime story} can make it a little more comfy for him to fall asleep & stay asleep.

“May sleep envelop you as a bed sheet floating gently down, tickling your skin and removing every worry.  Reminding you to consider only this moment.”

Jeb Dickerson

Sally Gets A Job {.019}

Repetition. One of the many things you have to look forward to when you are a Mother of a toddler. That’s how they learn! They repeat – everything. This I have gotten used to when it comes to repeating questions or phrases {Quentin hasn’t}. I either answer the question as many times as he asks or just listen to whatever catch phrase he’s interested in saying at the time.

Now, when it comes to reading books over and over…and over. I can’t get with it. It is so incredibly frustrating that I find myself rushing through the book he wants to read for the 42ND time.

Last night was no different. He wanted to read the same book that we have read together for the past week and a half – ‘Sally Gets A Job’. I’ll give it to him, when we read it for the first time I enjoyed it! It was a well written book! Now, one week and three days in I’m not so excited about reading it anymore. I even put the rest of the books out on the floor so he could pick something else! Nope! Still wanted to see Sally get the same stupid jobs she did before. At this moment in time Sally has about 37 jobs. She’s going to get fired from one of them!

Might as well prepare myself to take Sally to her job interviews for tomorrow.

A baseball swing is a very finely tuned instrument. It is repetition, and more repetition, then a little more after that.
Reggie Jackson